Connection

It is a chilly, gray, fall evening and I have just sat down on the couch with a sweet black pup sleeping on my right and a handsome, amazing man soldering pipes on the coffee table on the other side of her. I've got a shepherds pie in the oven for dinner and chicken prepped for tomorrow's chicken parm for guests and I am settling in with a glass of wine to write what I hope to be the beginning of weekly posts.

For the past week or so I have been thinking a lot about connection. My sister came to visit and when she left two weeks ago, it was the end of a very long stretch of craziness that started when I bought Isla. After making the trip to Maine I still had weeks of visits from my family and when Casie left it was the calm after the storm. I was left alone with my new reality. Alone to digest what I had just taken on. Alone to feel the weight of my decisions, the quiet, stillness of a new life. I had a foggy, emotional week as I processed being away from my family, but I also started finding my bearings in a place where I feel at home. A place where I feel like myself, like my heart and soul make sense, like I am part of something that I can relate to. Like it matters that I am here and contributing in this particular place.

After a conversation with a friend about how humans crave connection I started recognizing that every action I take is in pursuit of exactly that. The past month and a half has been centered around reconnecting to the people and place that I love and has been filled with perfect moments that I crave. Labor day weekend some of my dearest friends came to visit and we had a rare moment of all being in the same place at the same time.

Last weekend a college friend had the most beautiful, simple wedding on a farm in central Maine and it was a perfect day. I found myself in complete harmony surrounded by some of my favorite people, on beautiful land with the sun shining on a warm fall day... I can't even find the words to explain why I felt so balanced and at peace. But it has to do with connecting with pieces of myself, parts of my life that are important; human connection, connection with the earth, the importance of place, the changing of the seasons... it all has an energy that feeds my heart and soul and feels just right.

While I recognize that life and people change and forward motion is inevitable and important, this group of college friends being together in a place that we all feel a deep connection to was incredibly uplifting. It felt like time stood still for us, allowing us to have this brief moment where everything felt right. I have an amazing group of friends, and they all come from very different places, bring different things into my life, feed me in different ways and are all incredibly important. But my college friends are a particularly special group. They were with me when I was really starting to find myself. They knew me and lived with me through a time that was full of intense change, realization, growth and discovery. They know me in ways that I don't let a lot of people see and the comfort in that creates a bond that is hard to recreate. I am completely myself and with them I feel at home.

Lacey and I spent this past week getting ready for the Commonground Fair, the one event that I look forward to every year and never get tired of experiencing. It is the culmination of everything I have been trying to describe; a grouping of farmers, animals, crafters, people who live intentionally, support each other locally, speakers, musicians, amazing food and community in a giant field in the middle of nowhere Maine at a time of year when the landscape and weather is changing so the weekend is full of vibrant energy.

The leaves are starting to change, yellows, oranges, golds, reds, and some still green refusing to let go until they are ready. The grass is green, the dirt roads onto the fair grounds make your tires, shoes and barefeet the dusty brown of the earth that follows your footsteps through the day. Old and new friends are seen and made, and for one day or weekend, depending on how long you stay, everything you need is in this one little spot. An inspiring, eye opening, grounding spot. I came home last night feeling whole and connected as if I just need to plug into the fair's energy each weekend to replenish myself and stay grounded. Such a lovely treat that I anticipate every fall, that deepens my connection to the community around me, the earth, and my sense of place.

Just as I was sitting down to write this post Justin was snuggling on the couch with Lola and said that he completely understands how people with dogs live longer.

I smiled at the timing of his comment about connection with animals as we talked about how calming and amazing Lola's energy is and how she changes our lives. I am so incredibly happy to be where I am right now. And this doesn't happen often for me. I am happy in very short blips and then ready to move onto the next thing or pining for another place. The only thing that would make life more perfect is if my family were here as well. But for now, I am focusing on the positive, loving the pieces of my life and enjoying being happy.

I will drink wine and tea out of my new sweet mug that Lacey bought for me at the fair,

eat yummy meals off of my new table setting that I just had to buy because I feel like nesting,

and get into crafting mode, which I am so excited about...

The fall and winter is time to hunker down and create, drink tea, stay warm and be inspired with projects! I plan on holding onto this feeling and idea of connection through this perfect time of year. Time for warm, snuggling down! Happy fall everyone!